So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
Randomize