I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Randomize
