Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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