its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize
