considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
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