I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
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