my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
Randomize
