the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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