She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
Randomize
