I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize
