Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
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