I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
Randomize
