I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
Randomize
