Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize
