Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
