You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize