Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
This is classic penis vs brain.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
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