break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Randomize