I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
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