Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
she told me i tasted like america
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
Randomize