I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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