Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
I think I sprained my soul last night
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
Randomize
