Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
