just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
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