We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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