he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Randomize
