Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
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