Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
