One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
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