Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Randomize
