I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
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