it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
Randomize
