I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
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