You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
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