remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
just found out that she named her cat after me.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Randomize
