Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
Randomize