How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
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