why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
Threesome in a minivan. New low
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Randomize
