So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
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