we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
Randomize
