what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize