the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
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