Just had to reach into my sister's bag and shut off her vibrator so my parents wouldn't hear it. I am the world's greatest brother.
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
they call him Oral-B. enough said
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
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