dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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