Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Randomize
