So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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