If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize