we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
Randomize
