Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
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