I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
We just shotgunned beers for America
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
Sorry my hands just texted you
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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