Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Randomize
