i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Randomize
